Colorless

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Photos!!!

Hi hi!

Ok, many things happened since I last blogged but they're all normal mundane things of life. I shall not bore you with the details. Instead, I'm gonna post photos today!!! Yay!!! (Quick! Jump up & clap your hands!)

K, first, the Heritage Trail. =)

St Andrew's Cathedral:

From the inside:
The CBD, The Padang and the ex-Supreme Court:

The ex-Supreme Court:
Victoria Concert Hall with Sir Stamford Raffles' statue:
Sir Stamford Raffles:
The City Hall:
The Fullerton:
Boat Quay shophouses:
The Central Fire Station:
Ministry of Information, Communications and the Arts:
Ermm... obviously, Fort Canning Park:
CHIJMES:
Fort Gate:
Sally Port:
The National Art Museum:
Raffles Hotel:
Big VS Small:
The National Museum of Singapore:

Haha! Yeah... some of the nicer ones la. =P

Ok ok! I know they aren't like "WOW!" nice... but they're my nicest so far can? Can. You can't do anything even if u think cannot. *bleahs*

Ok, now I shall show u some infrared photos.

For those who are interested in the technicalities, infrared photos are photos that show the reflection of infrared light off objects. Mostly, foliage will reflect IR more effectively than other things. The whiter an object appears, the more IR light is reflected off it. Note also that this is near-infrared, not the thermal infrared so you don't get images like those used during the SARS outbreak. *nod me* Oh, and the photos are immensely noisy (meaning digital noise) because the Panasonic FZ line is infamous for its noisy sensor, unfortunately. =)

Yep! Ok, that's all for my infrared shots. =) Well, there are more of course, but it's ok. I won't put them up. Not until I get a better camera to take IR shots with, at least. *sigh* The woes of a noisy sensor.

Ah wells!

Even though everyday is mundane, my life is colorful & exciting when you're included! It's like, my life's a coloring book, and you're the set of Faber-Castell color pencils in the package! Thank you for being in my life. *hugs*

Love me if you dare... 22:37
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Thursday, January 18, 2007

After many days!

Whoa! So many days have passed without me blogging! Haha! Come, let me scribe it...

Friday:
Met Mao for dinner at Clementi. I was early, so I decided (somehow) to shorten or at least tidy-fy my mane abit. Looked around Clementi Central for a decent looking salon and decided to go to one that's pretty full and charges at $12. As always, I'm quite 隨便 about how my hair turns out... so the hair-stylist (his name was Tazz) decided to make me pseudo-Jap. He show me the kind of guys magazines that have those abit long hair then they wax then messy messy outta bed kinda look, y'know? Then I ok ok... in the end, eeeee...

Anyways, ate at the Clementi hawker coz I was quite poor & Mao didn't wanna spend too much coz she's treating me to ice-cream later on. Haha! Which leads me to-o-o:

The Daily Scoop!!!
(check it out!)

Wah, quite cool lor the flavours they have. =) Well, not alot la, but a few were cool. There's this Spicy Chocolate. Wow! Nice nice! It's really spicy spicy one leh. Haha! K, it's not as spicy as real chilli (at least not to me la. Mao seems to find it really hot though. =)) Should try la, if u ever go there. Then there was this Christmas Pudding flavour too... Mmm-mm! *both thumbs up & twisting at the wrists* Tastes so cinnamon-ny! I just love cinnamon! *grins from ear to ear*

We tried 2 other flavours: Unusually Apple and Cherry Brandy. They didn't have Lime & Black Pepper that day but I'd sure like to try that. =D And SoBerry Cheez too... gosh!

Saturday:
Went shopping around alone. Quite boring... and no mood also. Was in Suntec then saw U2 and G2K got sale & stuff... superly cheap lor. Haha! Really feel like buying alot of stuff... but then when u add them all up, it's like, more than $100 lor... no money ah... I need to work. =( *sobs*

Sunday:
Yay! Bought 4 Slim Fit t-shirts from Bossini. Already had 1 white & 1 black, but I still bought another 1 white & 1 black, and 1 green & 1 purple. Hahas! Now that's $36 already.

G2K got a couple of shirts that are nice but they're like, $29 each. Quite cheap if u just buy 1. But in the end, also don't have my size. *shrugs* Went to U2, bought a pair of jeans for $25... wanted to buy pants for $25 too but that'd be near $100 already, and I can't afford to spend so much. Oh wells... $61 is enough for an afternoon's shopping. =)

Oh yes: Happy Birthday Eugene!!!

Monday:

"... Rainy days and Mondays always get me down..."
-Carpenters: Rainy Days & Mondays

Well, it was a really rainy day, AND a Monday... heh. And to top things off, I had to come down with a fever & the beginnings of a sore throat. *bleahs* Ah wells, even with all these things bringing me down, I was lifted up, up, UP!!! =D

And I think it was Genghan's birthday? Happy Birthday!

Tuesday:
Went around taking photos... of the Heritage of Singapore... things like St Andrew's Cathedral, CHIJMES, VCH, City Hall, Supreme Court, Parliament House, etc etc. Met Jo for a not-so-quick lunch at Maxwell Food Court, then she headed home le.

Later in the evening, I met Melisa, Eunice & Sao (is that how you spell it?) for dinner. It was Eunice's birthday! Yay! Hahas! We had Ichiban Sushi at Parkway Parade, and Melisa made this Toblerone Oreo Cheesecake! Yummy! SO SWEET!!! I love sweet! Haha!

Happy Birthday Eunice!

Wednesday:
Stayed home most of the day. Went out in the late afternoon, then met up with the 86's to celebrate my sister's birthday at MindCafe. =) It was a really hilarious 2h spent there. Haha! Derrick & Jinsin were so crap (as usual). But it was an enjoyable time la... hope my sister enjoyed the company. Yep!

Happy Birthday Minghui!

Thursday:
K, Thursday started about 150min ago only so nothing much has happened yet, except for getting home from MindCafe & bathing & watching The Wild Thornberrys. But anyways, I suppose I'm gonna sleep le. I just typed this so I can have a paragraph before I say:

Happy Birthday Evelyn!!! Haha!

I must be crazy...

我知道我時常弄妳傷心。對不起。我會盡量把她從我生命刪除掉。真的。我愛妳。
And don't worry too much about your SMSes k? I'll SMS u more sweet msgs. =)
老婆，I really really love you ok? No other... ever.

Love me if you dare... 01:42
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Thursday, January 11, 2007

GOD is amazing!!!

Boos! Haha! Today was an amazing day! But first, show u something from an email:

"Many times when we say that God has answered our prayers, we actually mean that He has granted us our hearts’ desires according to our own wishes. So, when He does something different or not according to our desires, we will sadly say that He has not answered us. This is a mistake. Prayers are always heard if we pray in the name of our Lord Jesus. As what has often been shared, there are generally 3 kinds of answers, yes, no and wait. And when our desires are aligned to God’s will, our requests will not be withheld."

What if it's things like the weather? That kinda stuff... for the bus to come faster? Haha!

Today, I went to IKEA to get some containers for Esther and hopefully a rack for my shampoo & conditioner & shower gel & hair mask & facial wash. Went there on bus 27. Wah, shopped around for a while, supposed to be a quick tour la. When I got to the cashier, alamak! Pok ah!!! I can't find my wallet can! Immediately I knew I dropped it on the bus when I propped my knees onto the seat infront of me. Darn... Why must premonition be right?

I had only 10c left on me can. Hahaha! What an idiot. Called my sister to find out what's the other end for 27 and get the contact number for me. Wah, realized my phone left 3 bars of power only lor. Sekali cannot last till I find anything, then I'll be totally stranded lor. No communication, no money. *bleah*

So I prayed to GOD. I said, "GOD, please help me to find my wallet back. Please help me to not go through all the hassle of cancelling my cards and stuff. Amen."

Aiyah, I'm lazy to type. In short, the outcome was, I managed to convince a driver I lost my wallet, so I got a free ride, and on the way back to Hougang Interchange, the SBS personnel called me to say my wallet was found. When I got it, my money was still there too lor! So totally thank GOD.

Another thing was when I just reached IKEA. It was raining when I alighted. So I was stuck at the bus stop... and I prayed to GOD to at least make the rain smaller so I wouldn't be so drenched. The problem with many people is that they expect an immediate answer. Ok, I take that back. Haha! The problem with me most times is that I expect an immediate answer when it comes to weather. Anyways, I told GOD I'll wait till 11:30am for the rain to get smaller (the time was 11:25am) otherwise I'll just dash lor. And u know what? The rain got smaller & smaller gradually! Until at 11:30am, it totally stopped can! It's SO-O-O amazing!

Today, I witnessed GOD significantly in my life twice. Yay! =)

And hey:

"... You are not alone,
I am here with you.
Though you're far away,
I am here to stay.

You are not alone,
I am here with you.
Though we're far apart,
You’re always in my heart.

You are not alone..."

-Michael Jackson: You Are Not Alone

And today someone I prayed for me so much that GOD listened and responded so immediately! I love you... *hugs* Work hard ya, my darling...

Love me if you dare... 22:20
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Monday, January 08, 2007

No need for seperation!!! =)

"I'm so happy, I'm so glad,
That I found you!
I want to thank you,
And thank you means Merci!

Merci, my little way of saying 'thanks'!
Merci for being you."

-Merci Belgian Chocolates Advertisement

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Bernice, I'm NOT distracted. U can get to me almost anytime ok... *bleah* Hahas! No, seriously, I'm not k? We still haven't met up for a meal & a chat. *grin* Would u still be free now that the hols are over?

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Went to Laverne's place today to teach her the not-so-many functions of her Ricoh Caplio R660, mainly the macro function of the camera. She needed to take pictures of her hand-made jewellery, see? Yep! =) But the macro function is so inconsistent that we ended up using her dad's Nikon S9 to take most of her pictures. Haha! And she was really impressed with the S9, so I told her to just sell off her Ricoh if she can. *nod me*

Hmm... I need a bag. K, I want a bag. How how? I want white one... so I can match with my lighter clothes. And one with girlier colors? Hahaha! So I can match with my purple & pink clothes... How how how? Should I buy or should I make? Lalalala! Dunno la... see how I feel when I see a suitable bag.

I love my lao po! =) And we don't need to be seperated anymore! Yay!!!

Love me if you dare... 22:03
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I dunno what to type for a title.

Hi! The past few days have been quite boring... Nothing interesting. I can't even remember where I went. Haha! I just remember that I've been going out most of the time without any footwear. Yep! Barefooted. Hahas! It's quite comfortable... really. U get to feel all kinds of ground you're on. Yeah yeah, I know... it can be quite disgusting, especially in public toilets & hawker centres & places like that... sticky & wet with GOD knows what. But I guess it's all in the mind eh? Haha! If u can overcome it in ur mind, u can overcome it with your feet!

Went to IKEA Tampines yesterday for a walk. Haha! It seems huger than the Queensway one... is it? I think so... or maybe it's just because of the crowd then the pace just becomes slower. *shrugs* Whatever. There were SO-O-O many humans la! *tsk tsk* But nvm la... it was huge enough to be still walkable. *grin* Some of the beds were so comfortable! There was a point when I just laid there & wished I could sleep there & then. Hahas!

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Am I shutting myself out? Sometimes, I just don't feel like I belong. My enthusiasm just seemed to dwindle. I become so passive. I hate that I'm like that... yet at the same time, I don't feel enough to want to pike my enthusiasm. Yes yes, I laugh & play & stuff at times... but I wonder if those were real or superficial.

Does everyone go through a stage like this?

Am I alone?

Hello? *echos*

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Why do u need to split into 2? Is there someone who needs you? Binghui? Edwin? Chuan Lian? If someone else needs you, go to him/her? I'll be ok... really.

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It's been almost a week. I feel so empty inside. You see me being down & out, and you ask me why. How can I say? Isn't it obvious that it's because I need to hold you close to me? Isn't it obvious that without you, my life has become drab & dull? And yet, I will not allow myself to become weak-willed. I know you need time & space. It may seem that I've been trying to push u away, or push myself away from you. I only do this to ease my pain... to wallow in self-pity & drown myself in rhetorical questions. I'm sorry if the times u spent with me are dragging your spirits down. I don't want to do that. You have SO-O-O many other friends to lift your spirits up. Please go to them.

200m ! (: says:
haha. see? i told you nobody likes me
chuanlian says:
i love you lehs! hahahahaha
chuanlian says:
dont say that nobody likes you hor!

i love you too!

I told you. =P You think you're me ah?

Take your time ok? I'll be waiting for the day to come. But don't do it because I'm so down in the dumps. Do it because you truly can accept me.

"Nobody likes me.
Everybody hates me.
I'm gonna eat some worms.

CHORUS:
Long, slim slimy ones,
Short, fat, juicy ones,
Itsy, bitsy, fuzzy, wuzzy worms.

First you get a bucket.
Then you get a shovel.
Oh, how they wiggle and squirm.

First you pull the heads off.
Then you suck the guts out.
Oh, how they wiggle and squirm.

Down goes the first one.
Down goes the second one.
Oh, how they wiggle and squirm.

Up comes the first one.
Up comes the second one.
Oh, how they wiggle and squirm.

Everybody likes me.
Nobody hates me.
Why did I eat those worms?"

K, the last stanza doesn't stand for me...

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Guess I'm all alone eh?

I love you.
I wanted to say go away, but I know if you do, I'll just die. =(

Love me if you dare... 10:24
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Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Thank you Jo...

Thank you...

Dejected still... and ashamed. Very.

Heart aches, head spins, fingers hurt...

Please don't cry darling, please don't cry. I really hate to make u cry. =(

"... Good morning heartache,
Thought we said goodbye last night?
I tossed and turned
Until it seemed you had gone,
But here you are with the dawn.

Wish I'd forget you
But you're here to stay.
It seems I met you
When my love went away.
Now every day I start by
Saying to you,
Good morning heartache, what's new?

Stop haunting me now!
Can't shake you no how;
Just leave me alone!
I've got those Monday blues,
Straight through Sunday blues.

Good morning heartache,
Here we go again.
Good morning heartache,
You're the one who knew me well.
Might as well get used to you
Hangin' around.
Good morning heartache,
Sit down."

-Laura Fygi: Good Morning Heartache

Love me if you dare... 22:59
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Wander Wonder

Are my posts that scary? I think not. I'm just preparing myself... mentally & emotionally. That's all.

Been wondering the whole day: what you're doing, what you're feeling, what you're thinking... I miss you. But I just didn't wanna text you. I dunno why. I'm sorry.

=(

*sigh*

Simply don't understand...

*sigh*

I really miss u... totally. I'm just too ashamed to see you or talk to u. I'm sorry... =(
Please have a nice day in school tmr. Don't bother about me ok?

Love me if you dare... 18:21
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Monday, January 01, 2007

Sorry I can't be perfect...

Seems like I spun ur world even more out of control...

Sorry I hurt u so much...
Sorry u can never trust me again...
Sorry I lied...

Sorry I'm not perfect.

I don't blame u if u hate me... even I hate myself.

"... I'm never gonna be good enough for you.
I can't pretend that I'm alright...

...Coz [I] lost it all,
Nothing lasts forever,
I'm sorry,
I can't be perfect.

Now it's just too late,
And we can't go back,
I'm sorry,
I can't be perfect..."

-Simple Plan: Perfect

Love me if you dare... 23:30
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Dejected...

Heys... =) *sigh* Tired...

K, firstly,

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Yep! Haha! Couple of things to be thankful for the past few days:

Friday, 29th Dec 2006:
Kite-flying went quite ok. Though the kites couldn't fly (due, I suppose, mostly to my poor research into kite-design), those who came had quite an enjoyable time, I'd say. Yes? No? Especially when all of us got to decorate our own kites & get to bring them home. Haha! And the weather was terrific!!! No rain at all! GOD is so good can... =) Yay!

Saturday, 30th Dec 2006:
Lazed the whole day away reading & dozing, in between playing with Ian. Haha! Intended to bring him go shopping or something but ended up playing with his wooden blocks. =D Brought him home at night, and then spent the night at Shawn's place.

Sunday, 31st Dec 2006:
Churched, then had lunch with my Sunday sch class at MOS Burger at J8... haha! I'm comparing our age and the food we eat with the sec 3's class lunch, where they had Billy Bomber's a couple of weeks back. Haha! Oh wells... =) Anyways, played Captain's Ball awhile, not entirely exhilirating. Then went to 公公 house for a BBQ gathering. Haha! Yep, just ate & chatted & stuff... ok la. Rushed back to church at 10.30pm for the watch night service. We lit candles to the song "It Only Takes A Spark"! So cool! The whole congregation had a candle each & they turned off the lights of the sanctuary! If only I had taken a shot with my camera... it'd have been beautiful. But I chose to savour the moment live & just looked around me. Service spanned for about 150min! It was quite cool. Haha! In the end, a group of the youths stayed back... to watch 2 movies... -_- I just stayed outside of the lecture room with Esther & Hannah & Keith, and we talked the whole night away... well, more like battled the whole night away trying to break each other's score on my handphone's Puzzle Bubble. Hahaha! Wheee!!! So fun! =D

Yep! That's what's been happening the past couple of days!

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Y'know, u (k, I) can't help but think, why is it that only the younger youths are left behind after the watch night service? What happened to all the on-ness, all the enthusiasm of the senior youths? Maybe they've all got something else on hand. Then again, as the night wore through, I also can't help but feel kinda dejected. Have I gotten too old? What am I doing, trying to join in all their youthful activities still, when I should be resting more, learning more, or what-not at home. Maybe I shouldn't join in so much. I feel pathetic trying to belong when obviously I don't. At this point, Captain's Ball comes to mind too. Same feeling... pathetic. The senior citizens are now Zhixiang's batch... My batch has become dead... which is quite natural. Death comes pretty soon to all senior citizens. Heh. I feel weird just being there. As such, I have decided tentatively that I shall not join anymore Captain's Ball practise. My excuses may sound unreasonable... like, wha-a-a-at?! Haha! I dunno. Just... don't want lor. *sigh*

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I hate feeling helpless. Worse still is being unable to do something that I'm fully capable of just because of the circumstances & the way things are. Sucks can... =( And I'm still having those crappy feelings. The Dr. Jekyll in me keeps surfacing... and maybe it's even becoming a little bit more often than before! I hate it! I hate it hate it hate it!!! I TOTALLY HATE THAT FEELING!!!

*pants*

... but I can't help myself... *sob*

*roar*
Sorry I can't keep my promise at midnight. Sorry I'm so selfish. Sorry I'm so conscious of the guys around u... sorry if I ever made u feel exasperated. What's in a guy like me for u to fall for? *shucks*

Love me if you dare... 19:13
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