Colorless

Thursday, July 05, 2007

Random...

Hello people...

Just read Debbie's blog entry about clubbing & how we shouldn't be "endorsing" it by going, and I thought, yeah, she should quit it... even if it seems meaningful, even if it's to gather old friends & catch up. I mean, surely there are better places to and ambience to catch up and to let loose than a pub or a club?

At the end of her entry, she mentioned me! Haha! Yay! And to reply you, Debbie, if you ever read this, you're very welcome. It's the least I could do short of being physically there to talk to you, encourage you, and maybe give you a lil' hug or somethin' before your papers. A verse I sent to someone today:

"An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up."
-Proverbs 12:25

That sums up why, I suppose? =)

And talk about results, how could I not have blogged about my results? Haha! Ok, they're not fantastic (as usual), but I thank GOD, really really thank GOD that this is the best I've ever gotten.

ENTM3001 (Insect Diversity and Identification) : 5 (credit)
BIOL3011 (Plant-microbe Insect Interactions): 6 (distinction)
PARA3001 (Marine Parasitology): 7 (high distinction)

GPA for this sem: 6!

Yay! Ya-a-a-ay!!!

Ok, I shall stop it. It's my first 7 ever, and unfortunately, it's gonna be my last. Sadly, my overall GPA for all 3 semesters is below 6. Let's see: 5, 6, 5, 5, 4, 5, 5, 6, 7... tha-a-at's... only 5.33. *sigh* Oh wells... all the way from PSLE to O's to poly, and now uni, I guess it just goes to show I'm not that cut out for studying. I mean, I do well enough, but not exceptionally. Makes me wonder if I'm wasting my parent's efforts and money for sending me over here to study. Sorry to disappoint y'all... I don't think I've done my best either, but life here is more than just study to me. It's growing up, mentally, emotionally, spiritually... especially spiritually.

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Went to 小臺北 at SunnyBanks to eat just now. Melvyn likes the 十字路口 there... It's a western food store at a food court. Good steak, cheap price. Had a New York Steak set just now, Melvyn & Jesslyn shared a Combination Steak set (beef, pork, chicken).

After dinner, as we headed towards the car, auntie wanted to go into the supermarket there. Haha! Once again, we bought a huge load of stuff... I think when the girls are back, they're gonna kill me for not stopping them from buying lor, coz unless Jesslyn brings the food back to Canberra, it's all gonna be given to them. But how to stop? Auntie is like buying as if she's gonna stay here for a couple of months like that. Haha! Luckily Melvyn thought so too, and kinda curbed her BBB virus. =D We still bought lots anyways.

Headed back to Ind'roo, coz it's Thursday. Walked around in K-Mart looking for sale items. Auntie somehow wandered off somewhere, Melvyn & Jesslyn were holding hands & looking at stuff, I just felt kinda weird hanging out with the family. Feel so outta place, y'know? Maybe I shouldn't be staying at the Manors. Maybe I should go back to ol'Ind'roo. At least I'll be alone alone. And I can wonder & ponder & think all I want without concern about bothering others. It's better than being around people and yet still feel alone. Y'know what I mean? It makes no difference even if I hung out with all the friends I have here... something's missing.

And it's not coming back anytime soon...

*sigh*

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"why is everything crashing down?"

How do you answer that? I don't know sweetie. Maybe it's not? Maybe... maybe all we need is to come to GOD and trust in HIM, and we can run into HIS breast and cry and be like the child we are to HIM, and just weep our hearts out... and we can know that HE feels our pain and HE knows our hearts, and HE cares for us. Then we can cry ourselves to sleep in HIS everlasting arms, and HE will give us rest, and HE will comfort us. And we will have peace in us, because we trusted in HIM.

Sometimes I just feel so helpless. I really wish there's something more than just being there that I could do. I wish that I could be the physical arms that hold you close while you pray and talk to GOD, while you cry your heart out to HIM, and your tears will wet my shirt and soak my shoulders, and I will cry with you, and I will pray with you.

But I can't...

I'm sorry...

Love me if you dare... 21:09
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