Colorless

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Re-blog

Ok... I'm feeling much better now, as compared to this afternoon. Hence, I shall attempt to recall as much of the non-existent post as possible...

Heyo!

K, that sounds too happy. In fact, I'm not that happy.

I've been struggling with a huge dilemma for a long time. Currently, it seems that I needn't have struggled at all. Andy (my future-employer) has yet to submit the application to be a sponsor for me. Because of that, I am unable to apply for a 457 (which is a temporary work visa lasting up to 4 years) before my student visa is expired, and because of that, I will not be on a bridging visa after my student visa expires. So if I stay on in Australia, I will be considered as staying illegally in the country. My dilemma has to do with the off-chance that Andy's actually gotten his application in before my student visa expires and I get to get the bridging visa. Should I stay on here & wait till my work visa gets approved/declined, or should I go back to Singapore (as is the wish of my father) to await an answer from the Australian immigration department?

Anyways, friends back in Singapore who frequent my blog would be glad (or possibly indifferent) to know that it's most probable that I will go back soon. Friends here in Brisbane, sorry to let you know I'm going back so last minute. Things were really uncertain before, that's why I didn't let much people know. But hey, it's not like I won't be coming back. =)

The other day I was chatting with Pinky, telling him about my dilemma. He asked me to go back, of course. But I told him that I've more or less lost contact with most of my church friends and was worried that y'know when you're apart from your friends for so long, you just don't fit in very well? Especially when they've got almost 2 years worth of memories to cliqué, and they've got an extra 2 years of bonding... I dunno. It's alot to catch up with. There'll be new lame jokes, new catch phrases, new people even... and the old birds who flew away will have a tough time catching up with all those. Yes, I know given time, relationships get back to normal and you snap back into the loop with everyone. But by the time my application is approved (assuming it does eventually get approved), I'd still be in that incorporation phase... and I'd have felt left out and awkward all this time. What for? Pinky's still in that phase right now, and he says there're people who're mean and have hurt his feelings. Why so mean? Shit. But then he says, at least we've got each other. =) Thanks brother. You're right. We still have each other.

Why did I choose Singapore over staying here? I dunno man. If I go back to Singapore, I'd get to enjoy super convenient public transport, super cheap good food, COMEX, some church friends whom I'll never be unable to catch up with no matter how long we've lost touch, possibly some poly friends, and family. If I stayed on, I'd get to enjoy the coming of Spring, Riverfire, OCF, the company of wonderful friends from OCF & from church, the beautiful skies and sunsets, the many places to go and explore, wide variety of good cuisines, grocery shopping with the girls, hanging out at Three Monkeys, karaoke, touch rugby, BBQs... shit, why on earth did I choose Singapore over Brisbane?!

It's not a choice now though, so I don't feel all that bad.

Oh yes, Debbie, if you trust me enough, I could get a nice frame for u. Haha! You'd still have to brace yourself though, in case the ones I chose are just way too weird for u. Hahaha!

These couple of days have seen Karen & myself getting closer, I think. And I'm happy, coz first, I got close to Mel, then it was Jun. I think I took quite some time to get through to Karen. Haha! But yeah, I'm glad we're opening up a wee bit to each other. This afternoon, we had a one-on-one communal together at home coz she decided to skip her later lecture and just come home. Haha! Jun & Mel were still in class at that time. We both had tea, mine had milk. She had her brunch sandwich, I ate 2 slices of wholemeal with aoli. And we just chatted and walked to Chai's to get some groceries for lunch and dinner. It was a nice time spent together. Haha!

Ah-h-h-h... I'm so gonna miss the people here... =( Special mention to Vic, Jun, Feli, Karen, Debbie, Emily, Tiffany, and especially Mel. And I'm gonna be put back a few weeks to deepen friendships with people like Patrick, Jonathan, ST, Louis, and Pauline...

*sigh*

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This evening saw a rare lunar eclipse here in Brisbane. I only started to take pictures when the eclipse is receding about half off the moon. Lunar eclipses are rare because usually when the moon, earth and sun are aligned, the moon would be high enough not to be shadowed by the earth. These 2 shots show the shadowed side as well as the lighted side.

The red tinge is due to the sun's rays going through the earth's atmosphere and refracting onto the moon. It's the same reason why the sky is blue. For the exact scientific explanation, you'd have to go read up yourself. =)

Taken with a different exposure setting, this shot shows the bright side of the moon. Of course, that would mean the eclipsed side would just appear dark, and it'd look just like a normal moon pic.

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I hate seeing u like this... with a pained face and watery eyes. My heart is wrenched everytime I see you like that. I don't wanna go too. Yet I want to go back. I dunno. D'you know what I mean? I want to go back, but I want to stay more than I want to go back. But right now, it doesn't seem like I have a choice.

*hugs* Don't cry...

Love me if you dare... 22:38
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